Where do we go from here?
by Grey's Anatomy Addict
Summary: Post Season 9 Finale - everything has been said, what happens now...?
1. Chapter 1

**Post Season 9 Finale:**

**This starts as the finale ends. Merder oohing at Bailey and Zola, Jackson and April with an answered question, Callie and Arizona post fight.**

**This part is just about Cristina and Callie but I may expand so it is about everyone(:**

**Please let me know what you think(:**

**If requested I will write more(:**

Mere and Derek looked so adorable with Zola and their new baby, I couldn't burden her with my problems. They are happy, she is happy; she needed to be happy. I am happy she's happy but I need my person right now, but she needs to be left alone. I love Owen, I really do, but I can't crush his dream, he chose me over his desire, his need to have a child, but he will regret it one day, he will resent me. I need someone to love me, for me to be enough for them. Not what they want me to be, I cant do that again, I wont change for them. I am Cristina Yang and I plan to stay that way.

Now I need to be alone. I cant go to an on call room it's the blackout, they will be filled with loved up, gooey eyed medical staff. Which presents the question, where do I go? I have been pacing up and down these halls for 10 minutes now.

I saw Alex and Jo making out, so he's useless too; I can't take away his happiness just because I don't have mine. He needs to be happy after all the shit he's been through; Rebecca going crazy, Izzie leaving him, that bitch who stole his job in Africa Lucy Fields, he needs this.

April and Jackson are having some sort of fight, I walked past them a few minutes ago, and saw her standing by the door waiting, not quite sure what for, but they looked like they wanted to be left alone. This hospital is full of people right now, most of them too happy for me to burden them.

Having a sudden epiphany I slowly made my way to the attending's lounge, it is too late for anyone to be in it surely? The backup generator still hasn't turned on so it is still perpetual darkness; the storm is raging outside but inside the hospital its peaceful, everyone is asleep, waiting out the storm. Opening the door I find Callie hunched over on the couch, I take a step back, ready to leave until I can make out the sound of her crying over the wind hissing outside. "Callie?" she looks up at me and even in the dark I can see her eyes are red and puffy, with tears streaming down her face, a tissue clutched in her hand. She looks how I feel. I rush over to her, I love Callie, I am Sofia's godmother, who knows why, and I hate to see her like this.

Sitting beside her I let her head fall on my shoulder and I pass her a tissue, "Honey whats wrong?" I cringe slightly at the use of honey, I don't speak like this, ever, but it seemed appropriate. Where on earth was Arizona why isn't she dealing with this? "I lost her." Was she talking about a patient? I don't know why would she care so much about the death of a patient, sure they affect us, but they don't usually give us this much pain. Unless your Derek and you kill a pregnant woman, hid in the woods and call Meredith a lemon. Instead of guessing I simply asked, "Who did you lose?" "Arizona." I don't know what she means, did she leave in the middle of the storm or something, "I'll go find her." I say preparing to stand. "She slept with someone." This sounded all too familiar. "What!" "She slept with someone to get back it me." Wow that hit home. But Arizona was a Peds surgeon, she was a happy, over energised bunny most of the time. How could she do this to Callie? The plane crash had changed us all, ever since the amputation something inside her morphed, but it seemed as if she getting better. "All because of that damn leg."

I put my arm around her, hugging her, "I broke up with Owen." She raised her head and looked at my through her tears, "Why?" "He wants children, I don't. I can't give him what he wants, and I don't want to take away his dream." Resting her head back on my shoulders she took a deep breathe, "Bitches." I smiled, "Yeah." "She said I hadn't lost anything." A wave of grief washed over me, I saw Lexie lying beneath the plane with Mark holding her limp hand, and I saw Mark lying in ICU and I envisioned her crying over him when they cut off the life support. "Oh Callie." I always felt awkward trying to comfort people, Callie and I were close once, we are still friends, never like Mere and I though. Mark was her person. If Callie was Meredith, Arizona would be her Derek and Mark her me.

All I felt like doing was punching Arizona in the face, or getting Karev to. I love Arizona, put with wet splotches on my scrubs and a snivelling Callie crying onto my shoulder I forcing me to pick and I chose Callie. I am aware that there are two sides to every story and all I know is Callie's but she was my friend first. "What can I do?" I look around the room, trying to find an idea scattered around me, spotting an empty Chinese container, "Food?" "No." she sniffed. Bingo. "Drinking. I feel like drinking." Lifting her head up, she picked up her tissues that were scattered around her, "I'll go get some." Trudging towards the bin I noticed something about her demeanour had changed, she seemed, I couldn't pick my finger on it. I watched her open a high cabinet, rise onto her tiptoes and pull out a bottle of tequila and two shot glasses.

Then it hit me. She looked shorter. It appeared as if this new personal disaster had cut about 2 inches off her. "It's only half full, but it'll do for now." I nodded, "I think there might be some Scotch in the bottom cabinet if need be." She looked surprised, almost as if she figured there would only be one hidden bottle of alcohol in this room. "What we really need is some of your Alzheimer's drinks, what were they called?" she asked with a smirk spreading across her tear ridden face. Laughing I recalled my one time gig of bartending, "Early onset Alzheimer's." Taking the bottle and glasses off her I filled them to the brim. "Right, because you won't remember anything after you drink it." Callie added laughing. "Oh shut up and drink your tequila." "With no salt? What sort of bartender are you?" she said pulling a puppy face. "One that only lasted a night." One shot down, I leaned over to fill my glass again, "Another?" Callie put her glass on the table, "Another."


	2. Chapter 2 - Miranda Bailey

Bailey Post Season 9 Finale

This is happening at the same time as Cristina and Callie, they are not intertwining yet, they will soon but I just want to establish each individual section first.

Ben came running towards me, stopping in front of me he pulled me towards him, "I couldn't be more impressed." He chimed.

I looked frantically from left to right, deep in thought, searching. I barely looked at him. Grabbing me by my shoulders he steadied me, looked into my eyes and spoke, "Hey. Hey are you alright?"

Still moving my eyes side to side, I inhaled deeply, I had no intention to stop; I needed to find him. I hurriedly replied, "I need to talk to Richard." Moving my head, I scanned the room, searching. I had no idea where he was, after surgery he was the one person I wanted to see. I continued, "Look he came to me. He tried to help me and I called him a drunk." I saw the expression on Ben's face changed, not much, but it did. He didn't look amused but almost shocked that I would say something like that to Richard. Rambling on I continued, "I blamed him. I turned on him of all people That man!"

Looking me dead in the eyes, without hesitation Ben responded, "Hey, hey, hey." He shook me lightly, he was trying to ground me, steady me, to gain my full attention. "It's okay. He knows you better than you think." A smile spread across his face, the worry quickly vanishing behind it, "Maybe you owe him an apology."

"NO I owe him everything." I exclaimed. Where was he? "Now do you know where he is?" I inquired. A blank look covered his face, I watched him thinking, trying to pinpoint when he last saw him.

"No, I have no idea." He answered. Shaking his hands off my shoulders, I turned to continue my search. Running after me, he pleaded, "Miranda just take a second, just relax and…"

"I need to find him." I said cutting him off.

"I'll help then." He replied, adamant not to let me go alone. I nodded my head, not really wanting his company right now but knowing it was easier this way. I needed to find Richard, to tell him, to apologise.

"Fine" I managed to mumble. I strode off towards the nurses' station with Ben in tow. "Can you page Dr Webber please?" I instructed one of the nurses, Kim.

Looking up momentarily she smiled and replied, "Sure." I stood still for a moment, feeling powerless, not having any clue where he was, what he was doing, how he was feeling. He needed to know that I was sorry, that I didn't mean what I had said.

Ben placed his hand on my shoulder trying to relax me, failing, but still trying. The phone rang. Maybe it was a reply to the page. Kim picked up, spoke into it, stared at her computer and then lowered the phone from her ear. "Dr Warren they need you in OR 2, 24 year cyclist with extensive injuries."

Sighing he looked at me, then back at the nurse, "Tell them I'm on my way."

"Yes doctor." Kim replied and went back to talking into the phone.

"Will you be okay?" Ben asked me, turning me towards him.

"Yes. Go." I responded half-heartedly, Ben was not my main concern right now, finding Richard was. Turning my full attention to Kim I asked, "Any response?"

Hesitating she checked the screen, clicked a few buttons then looked up at me, "No Dr Bailey."

"Then page him again!" I instructed.

"Yes Dr Bailey." She replied.

Obviously this approach wasn't working. I needed to look for him. Maybe he was in surgery. That could explain the lack of reply, perhaps. But the nurses usually checked them. Pushing that thought away I made my way to the OR board. I walked over the elevator, pushed the button and stood still, waiting, again. Waiting gave me time to think about what I would say once I found him, most likely it would be one of my speeches, where I rattle on about everything, in a lecturing tone. The elevator sounded and the doors opened revealing a torn looking Owen.

"Chief you okay?" I asked, sure I was busy but this had been a hell of a day for all of us. With the storm and all of the issues regarding the lights, I doubt it had been an easy day for Owen. While awaiting his reply I stepped inside the elevator and pushed the button.

Briefly looking at me he muttered, "Yeah. Fine thanks." Before heading off in a fast pace towards, well I have no idea where he was heading towards. The elevator doors shut behind him as he went around the corner. The elevator whirred and all thoughts of Owen left my mind as the elevator doors opened once again to reveal the floor I wanted to be on.

Muttering to myself I quickly walked towards the OR board, hoping that he was in surgery as that would make him easy to find. Scanning the board, I discovered that he wasn't on it, which meant he wasn't in surgery, which meant I was still no closer to finding him. "Do you know where Dr Webber is?" I frantically asked one of the nurses at the nurses' station, Mary.

"No but I can page him if you wish." She replied pausing for a second to page him and then rushed off. I stood waiting, again. I gave up after only a few minutes and headed off in search of him. I thought to myself, 'Maybe he was tired, and wanted to rest.' Unlikely in a storm this size, he would probably want to help out, not wanting to go have a nap. Ignoring that thought I went to check the on call rooms on this floor. I knocked on the first door and out came a muffled cry that faintly resembled a 'try another one'. Obviously, they were preoccupied. The next door I tried gave no response from within when I knocked and when I tried the door handle was unlocked. Flicking the light on I discovered it was vacant. Five minutes later I had checked all of the on call rooms on this floor and none of them contained Richard. I rushed off towards the stair well when I heard a "Dr Bailey" came from a room to my left.

Putting a smile on my face I turned towards the noise and walked into the room. A smiling Meredith and Derek greeted me, Derek holding a laughing Zola and Meredith holding her new baby. "Dr Bailey..." Meredith began but I quickly cut her off with a question,

"Have you seen Richard?"

A worried look clouded her joyful expression as she replied, "No. Why?"

Faking a smile of reassurance I quickly responded, "Just curious."

She eased up and looked down at her beautiful new born, "I wanted to tell you..."

Once again cutting her off I remarked, "Sorry must be going, I will come visit you later." I turned and left leaving a confused family behind me.

Rushing down the stairs I headed down to the ER. When I arrived I swivelled by head side to side doing a quick scan of the room, seeing interns smiling in delight as they stitched up the bus victims, the joy of their faces was just surreal on a day like today. Richard wasn't anywhere to be seen. Stepping forward I headed into the first trauma room, opening the door I found it was empty. The next trauma room had a patient lying on the bed and surgeons barking instructions at the nurses and crazy hyperactive interns getting in the way, but no Richard. Checking the other rooms I still found no sign of Richard.

I wondered past a room where Jackson and April sat and stood, respectively, still not moving, not speaking. I wonder what their problem was, it was none of my concern however so I pushed that out of my mind and headed away from the ER.

As I reached the next nurses' station, I said to Anna, one of the nurses, "Page Dr Webber. Please." Nodding she picked up the phone, typed a few things on the computer, stood up and began flipping through a patient file.

Clearing my throat she looked up at me and said, "No reply Dr Bailey."

"Do you have any idea where he is?" I inquired. I was running out of patience, I had been running around the hospital looking for him and I couldn't find him anywhere. He couldn't have gone home, the storm prevented him from leaving, so where could he be. Anna shook her head in reply, picked up a few more files and hightailed it away from me.

"Doctor?" A voice called out from behind me.

I had neither time nor patience, sighing deeply I turned and sharply responded with an edge to my voice, "Yes?"

"I might know where he is." An old man sitting in a wheelchair in front of me said.

"And where would that be?" I added abruptly.

"Last time I saw Dr Webber was down in the basement about half an hour ago." He answered me, taking no notice of my tone. He was wearing hospital uniform, it must have been an electrician or mechanic or janitor or something like that. Obviously not a doctor or nurse but definitely someone who worked here, although I didn't really recognise him. But that didn't count for much as it had been a hectic day and last few weeks, I wasn't quite myself yet.

"The Basement…" I pondered aloud. What on earth would he be doing down there? It did explain why I hadn't yet found him. I never would have thought to look down there.

He replied, "To get the power up and running again Doctor, I was going to do it but then well," pausing for a moment he placed his oxygen mask back over his mouth, took a deep breath, removed it and continued, "He may not be down there anymore but perhaps…"

"Thanks." Pivoting on the spot, I ran towards the elevator that was just closing, making it just in time. A few floors down the doors opened again, everybody else filed in and Arizona got in. I stood still and silent, thinking, while Arizona stood snivelling next to me. Turning my attention to her I looked her up and down, everyone was so distraught today. I opened my mouth to ask her a question just as the doors opened and without glancing in my direction she rushed out, much like Owen did only minutes ago.

The doors shut and I finished my descent to the basement. As I scanned my card the elevator doors opened and I stumbled forward, unaware of what direction I should be heading in. "Richard!" I yelled as I walked towards the flickering lights.

"Are you down here?" I shouted as I took a deep breath and discovered a weird smell of something singed. Walking with purpose now I turned corners, not knowing where I was going but with each moment new thoughts ran through my mind.

"I have all these crazy scenarios running through my head." I yelled as I came around yet another corner. I stopped for a moment as a thought crossed my mind. Pulling my phone out of my pocket, I dialled his number and pressed call. All was silence for a just moment; all I could hear was my breathing and ringing sound on my end of the phone. But then in the distance I could hear his phone going off, with some obnoxious ringtone, the loud beeping variety, that incidentally was perfect to locate him. Following the sound of his ringing phone I went round corner after corner, discovering I had gone in the wrong direction once I left the elevator.

The ringing got louder and clearer as I went around yet another corner and there I found Richard. Lying there, on the ground not moving, the only sound coming from him was the sound of his phone. Hanging up I dropped to the ground and rolled him over onto his back. "Richard!" I exclaimed as I leant down to check his pulse, it was there but it was thready. I quickly dialled the ER nurses' station, put my phone on speakerphone and placed it on the floor beside Richard's limp body. As it rung I started compressions, "Come on Richard." I pleaded.

"Evening Dr Bailey how may I help you?" A chirpy nurse chimed down the phone.

"I have Dr Webber down in the basement, he has collapsed, his pulse is thready he requires urgent medical attention." I explained.

"Sending people down now." The nurse replied.

"Make it quick, there isn't much time." I belted. Hanging up the phone I stopped compressions for a moment and stared down at Richard, "You can't die." I muttered as I once again checked his pulse. "You won't die." Then desperately I begged, "Please don't die."


End file.
